


skylight, seashore

by hexburn (thestormapproaches)



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Disorder, Boyfriends, Cuddling & Snuggling, Depression, Domestic, Domestic Boyfriends, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, Love, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mild Sexual Content, Sea imagery, Sky Imagery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-10
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-06 18:22:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26383312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thestormapproaches/pseuds/hexburn
Summary: Nick is a sky, in all his varied moods, from sunrise to sunset and everywhere in between, from clear to cloudy to rainy to storming and back again. And Jus loves him.
Relationships: Nick "LS" De Cesare/Juš "Crownshot" Marušič
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	skylight, seashore

Nick is a sky. 

That’s the best way Jus knows, to describe his shifting moods and alternate brightness and sadness, his lovely sweetness and then the overwhelming ache of his self-hate, his highs and dangerously low lows.

Sometimes the days are bright and clear. Nick smiles, he laughs, he loves Jus the way a summer sky loves sunlight and he never ever stops. He’s sweet and he’s happy, or at least comparatively happy - Jus knows that despite his best efforts, Nick’s depression won’t magically vanish without medication that works. But Jus is proud to hold all his little moments of bright blue skies and beautiful sunrises and gorgeous sunsets, all the times when they walk through Berlin hand in hand, all those little smiles and sweet giggles.

Sometimes the skies are sweet with pollen and nectar and flowery perfumes - when Nick is underneath him, nothing else feels quite so perfect. He’s utterly perfect like this, thighs pressed tightly around Jus’s hips, arms slung around Jus’s neck, lips blooming pink, every little breath with another moan. He hugs Jus close to him, embracing him like the warmth of spring after winter. Nick even unconsciously pulls Jus closer, deeper, further and further to the edge with every gentle surge forward into wet heat, welcoming as a breeze in May. 

It isn’t often that they have time for sex between so much work on their plates, but every once in a while Jus sets aside some time for them, even marking it in Nick’s digital calendar with a series of tasteful peach and banana emojis. Jus decorates with fake candles and gentle, dim lights when it’s his turn to prep for their date nights. Other times, Nick surprises him after a long day of scrims with ordered dinner and plentiful kisses and all the prep done so that Nick is open and ready whenever Jus is. 

His lips always part so prettily when Jus pushes into him when he’s like this, slicked and eager. Each moan and gasp is a summer breath of wind, soft and light and so cute, so sweet. His lips drip with nectar that Jus eagerly laps up, and the closer Nick gets, the deeper the sunset flush of pink over his collarbones and chest and shoulders becomes, and all the richer are his delicious whines and whimpering cries. He comes with a squeak and a moan and a beautiful toss of his head and a gorgeous, tight friction - Jus is always quick to follow him. Then, they snuggle in the twilight afterglow. If they’ve been particularly messy, Jus gets a damp towel to wipe up; otherwise, tissues will make them comfortable enough to last until tomorrow morning. 

No matter what happened yesterday or happens today or will happen tomorrow, Jus is sure to enjoy every moment of these nights, when the skies are perfumed with love, joy and the smell of sex.

Sometimes it’s softly cloudy, gentle and breezy and light, not perfect or happy but calm and peaceful. Jus pushes their little two-person sofa over to Nick’s desk, lining it up so Nick can sit how he likes and Jus still gets to flop over on his lap and snooze a lazy day away with the comfort of Nick’s thighs as his pillows. The sound of Nick’s keyboard lulls him to sleep alongside the occasional brush of slender fingers through his hair. He daydreams of snuggly nights and Nick’s sunshine and clouds and rain. Every thought is of Nick, until he falls asleep, and knows only the soft, sweet fog of sleep and love. 

On occasion, Nick wakes him up by trying to sneak away for water or coffee or a bathroom break, or he nudges Jus’s shoulder to tell Jus he’ll be on a call, or recording, or streaming. This news is rarely enough to make Jus resign himself to the bed that still sits in Nick’s office. More often it doesn’t bother him unless it bothers Nick, and so more than a few podcasts and streams are made with Jus laying next to and on top of his boyfriend.

Besides that, though, one of the best ways to spend the day is with their roles reversed, Jus working (playing soloQ) and Nick snuggling his thigh until he falls asleep and takes a midday nap. If it’s been a rough week in terms of Nick’s insomnia, this is one of the few ways he can find sleep that doesn’t end up so poor-quality that it’s useless. If letting Nick sleepily murmur against the crook of Jus’s hip and nudge Jus’s elbow whenever he readjusts himself and squeeze Jus’s waist and mush his face into Jus’s stomach and drool all over Jus’s shirt while he sleeps will at least let Nick sleep, then it’s worth it.

The best cloudy days are when it’s raining outside and they’re warm and cosy inside together. Not that they go outside regularly, but it’s nice to have these quiet days that feel just right for ignoring the world and instead getting caught up in each other’s smiles and snuggles. Jus lets Nick rest his head on Jus’s arm and hug him close as they lay in bed. Nick naps, or tries to, while Jus watches a random show or Rat’s stream or LPL vods or LCK, and if Nick can’t sleep, he’ll steal one of Jus’s earbuds and roll over so he’s the little spoon and they’ll watch together. At least personally, this is one of Jus’s favourite positions, with one arm under Nick’s head and the other draped over Nick’s waist and with Nick snuggling against him. It’s as warm and comforting as thick blankets on a cool, calm day, and Jus really can’t think of anything too much better than spending time with Nick. They don’t have to talk. They don’t have to make out or get steamy. Just cuddles and chill is more than enough for both of them on these lazy, foggy days.

Sometimes it rains. Jus might be making them dinner, or washing a few spare dishes, or desperately trying to figure out the laundry machine, but it’s always the same pattern. He’s doing something innocuous, and there’s no sign of distress until he turns to see Nick at his side with tears streaming down his face. In these times, when Nick hasn’t slept for more than a feeble nap in several long days, there’s often nothing Jus can do but put a thick blanket in the dryer for a few minutes to warm it up and then wrap it around Nick, making him the most comfortable he can be when his mind won’t stop its self-onslaught. Jus offers kisses and big, squishy hugs and cuddle time on the couch as recompense for the pain Nick is going through. They put a show on an old laptop that whirrs audibly, and Nick’s eyes rain as they watch. Jus does his best to suppress the sympathetic tears that always threaten to overflow.

Eventually, with cheeks salty and wet from the flood, Nick’s defeated slump against Jus’s shoulder turns into a ragdoll limpness. He’s fallen asleep - though how good the sleep is, Jus is never certain - and Jus very carefully lays Nick’s legs out on the couch, helping him lie down with his torso cradled in Jus’s arms. Nick looks so sad like this. Eyes still gathering raindrops even as he sleeps. Nose dripping tears his eyes didn’t shed. Face splotchy and red-cheeked. Waterline inflamed from so much crying. Lashes tangled in drops that won’t fall, hair smeared across his face… Gently, Jus smoothes out Nick’s hair and kisses his forehead and wipes all the mess away until Nick’s sleeping sweetness is all that remains.

He settles back into the sofa’s welcoming plushness with a sigh, still cradling Nick in his arms. He will still be cradling Nick when they both reawaken.

Sometimes it storms. Jus holds Nick close while Nick screams and cries at the monsters in his head, and he muffles every anguished screech in Jus’s broad chest, his hands scrabbling along Jus’s sides for something to hold onto before swinging down onto the bed in a painful crash. Most often, Jus straddles Nick’s lap and pats his back and soft hair while Nick unleashes the monsoons in his head. Rain pours down his cheeks, lightning strikes in his eyes, thunder echoes from his throat into Jus’s ribcage and lungs.

Gently, Jus soothes him as best as Nick can be soothed. These fits of anxiety only break through every so often, but when they do, they’re uncontrollable, and so the best Jus can do for Nick is simply be with him as it happens and with him when it’s over. Poor Nicky. Jus rubs his hands along Nick’s back as a reminder of his love and patience, and bit by bit Nick’s tears dry up and Nick’s hands stop thrashing madly about, instead settling on Jus’s back, hugging him lightly, quaking all the while. Once Nick’s tears and screams are spent, Jus makes dinner. Something simple, always - usually microwaved rice from the day before and some chicken or fish with vegetables. It’s never much, but it’s enough to eat with Nick as he sniffles and they snuggle in bed. No distractions, no phone, no TV or computer, just them sitting and leaning against each other and quietly munching on their bowls of food. Occasionally, Jus feeds Nick a bite from his own bowl or from Nick’s. Just a little, sweet, playful gesture to make Nick smile again, even if only for a moment.

These storms don’t end quickly. As always, their meal is the eye in the hurricane, soon to be followed by more rain, and it’s just a matter of time until Nick will have to cry himself to sleep because the insomnia will take hold again. Still, Nick never falls asleep alone. Nick may be a lone star, a shining gem in the sky, above anyone and anything else.

Well then, Jus will have to be the clouds floating by, holding him dear, cradling his light and keeping it safe in soft fluffiness.

Nick’s tears after the eye of the storm has passed are mostly anger at himself and sadness, deep sadness, not the same sort of venting stress that he has to thrash and scream his way through. Instead it’s self-hate, and self-doubt, and hatred of who he is and how he’s so horrible to Jus, how he isn’t enough and doesn’t do enough and Jus shouldn’t have to deal with him when he’s like this, as if stars never twist and contort and explode in solar flares. Sometimes Jus’s sadness at how Nick hates himself so much keeps him awake at night - never as late as Nick’s sleepless hours, but late. On rare occasions, he’s up when Nick finally cries himself into exhaustion and sleep, with Jus’s hands petting through his hair, smoothing the soft, silky mess into neat, orderly rays. Even rarer still are the times when Jus is still awake when Nick’s lashes flutter open. His face breaks into a soft smile and his eyes are red and he still sniffles over breakfast, but then he hugs Jus and cleans up the breakfast dishes and settles down with Jus at his side. Usually, if he’s stayed up all night, Jus is dead tired and wants nothing more than to sleep.

On nights and days like these, though, Jus makes sure Nick has fully cleared the storm before daring to fall asleep with his head on Nick’s shoulder.

From sunrise to sunset and in all his different weathers, Jus loves Nick.

And Nick loves Jus just as deeply in return.

**Author's Note:**

> check out [this document](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1qd6l89vHBcsfqecW3Bbo6UoYFS3L59I1iE3l-Qn69YI/edit?usp=sharing) for a daily-updated list of my WIPs! also check out [my writing twitter @shyverrr_v2](https://twitter.com/shyverrr_v2) for tweet updates (and to chat, ofc!)


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